A Glimpse of Wes
It was easy for me to assume that I knew Wes. We shared a lot. We went to the same school, played in the same band, asked the same existential questions. We spent hours on the phone, talking about friends, family, our Berklee days, nutrition, and whatever the main topics of our lives were at the time. So of course, with that information in mind, it was easy to assume that I knew him well.
Soon after he passed away, that tragic, unforgettable, unforgivable day of January 30th, my knowledge of Wes began to flicker. You see, I had drawn a specific portrait of Wes in my head based on my relationship with him. The fact is, while around me, Wes always seemed deeply absorbed in thoughts. He often said: “I have a lot to say about this…” or “if you don’t mind, I really want to pick your brain about that”, and life’s everyday struggle was no laughing matter. So to me, Wes was a serious guy.
Over the past couple of months I have had many conversations with people who, like me, thought they knew him rather well. Gradually, and as a result of making friends, that picture of Wes, once a solid snapshot, began to crack and shatter, to finally become a 5000-piece puzzle, which all of us have spent many days and night trying to assemble.
Ironically, this reconstruction of Wes through various recollections and stories has been pointing at quite a multi-faceted, almost prismatic picture of a Wes very few of us seemed to know at all. What kind of Magician was he, to be able to wrap parts of himself in an invisible cloak and cleverly select who would see what? Was he just playing a game with us, some sort of hide and seek he very diligently designed while living amongst us? Or did he simply feel that none of us could ever fulfill his needs entirely, merely able to contain a tiny piece of Wes in our minds?
I have to be honest with you. The latter is what I believe. I think that Wes, like all spirits of great strength, knew to show each of us the parts of him we could comprehend…and love.
Wes, wherever you are, please know that the complete picture is more beautiful than you will ever know, and forgive me for presuming that we finally got to catch a glimpse of it.